Fuck appropriateness.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
