The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
