I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize