i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
