belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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