Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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