shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
