Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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