So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
we're making bets on your personal life
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
