Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
