your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
