Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
