piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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