great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
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