he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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