I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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