I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
