It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
