I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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