walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
