the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
