omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
