That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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