I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
