Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
ttyl tear gas
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just high enough for therapy.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
