You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
