so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
