We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
