just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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