Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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