this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
