coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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