I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize