I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
