Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize