Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
