i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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