just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
party gras won. party gras always wins.
ttyl tear gas
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
