just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
