Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
my liver is dry heaving
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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