why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I have fence marks all over my body
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize