scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
