Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
