What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
