the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
