is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
