Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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