There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
