We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize