sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
if i died would you start the facebook group?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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