I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
